Reflections on our Anniversary……..

A cloud of mist rose above Niagara Falls. It sprayed on our faces and soaked us where our ponchos didn’t cover. For a brief second, I held my breath. We were close- dangerously close to the roaring falls, but all too soon our little boat turned itself around and I felt secure again.

Nathan and I were on an anniversary excursion. Seven years. We discussed future plans…we dined on the Skylon Tower.

…..and hiked…

….and contemplated zip lining.

Eventually we were “adventured” out and rested in our motel. Our thoughts travelled home to our precious little girls and we called to say good night.

Seven years- and two little girls. Time and experience have changed us, but he is still my one and only. We’ve had hard times and good times… the hard times have brought us closer.

We talked and dreamt of future things and how little control we really had on the future. We talked about what we wanted for our children and what we would remember when we were seventy-five. We needed these uninterrupted conversations…this reviewing of our lives. Our life together.

I read once that a lot of couples divorce after the children move out. After focusing on the children, they realize they don’t know each other anymore. What a sad case. If being a Christian takes daily devotions, than what does a marriage need? We, as women, have a huge part to play into this. We pour our lives into our children (and this is good) but do we balance it with tending to our marriages?

Just after we were married, I loved putting little notes into Nathan’s lunch pail. I saved some of them “just because.” It doesn’t happen very often anymore and I wish it would. These days, he seems to appreciate the time I spend to pack his lunch at all.

Time and children change things. One evening, we had a friend staying overnight and we took this opportunity to bike around town alone together. This rare occasion was just as much fun as dining on the Skylon Tower. We are now enjoying bank appointments, or whatever it may be, to get to spend some alone time together. However, we do make a point of scheduling one evening a month as “ours.” On one such evening, we played the Dollarama game. We went in different directions and bought those five items we believed the other one would pick. It created some laughs and good memories.

I wonder…what would someone write about who was married for twenty-five years? What advice would they give us? I remember asking someone this very question before I got married. “Patience,” she said, “and lots of it.” “Well,” I thought, naively to myself, “Nathan was one- of-a -kind so I was sure it wouldn’t take too much.” It turns out we both needed it!

I think my advice would be this: Cherish the moments you have together; take your marriage seriously, but don’t forget to have fun along the way!

As we drove home we happened upon a cute lavender farm. “We must stop!” I exclaimed. “Well I’ll just catch a little nap while you explore,” he yawned. “Oh no, you won’t,” I said, “ that’s no fun at all!” So hubby was dragged out of the car and was my faithful sidekick while I delighted in all the cute little things.

(We did not buy lavender ice cream!)

Isn’t that just how it is? We love doing these things and they cheerfully suffer in silence because they love us! I might do the same and split firewood for an afternoon because that is HIS idea of a good time together. We give and take….and sacrifice and are richly blessed. We argue (for the fun of it) and laugh at ourselves. And sometimes, sometimes…we are truly upset with them, but by the grace of God we talk it out and stay best friends.

Marriage is a beautiful and sacred thing. We keep praying that we can gain an even deeper understanding of it…and for many more years together.

And now? Now it is time to go back to our little girls again.

I can hardly wait.